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Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Ephesians 5:22-24

 

Q: I find this passage quite detestable. It diminishes women and says that husbands are to be dominate over them, and the women have to sit back and do whatever their husband says. How can you follow a God that endorses this?

 

A: I’ll start this by letting the Bible speak for itself. In the Bible, there are commandments for wives, husbands, children, elders of the church, people in general, etc. This is a passage directed towards wives, so let’s look at what the Bible says about how husbands are supposed to treat their wives, and conveniently we’ll find this in the next verses.

 

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.

 

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Ephesians 5:25-33

 

Context is once again important here. As we can see, the Bible tells husbands to love their wives as they love themselves, and to nourish and cherish their wives as they would their own bodies. This passage also tells husbands to love their wives the way Christ loves the church. Christ died for the church. Husbands are being called to lay down their life for their wives. This is nowhere near the dominating, controlling, whip-cracking husband that the question makes this out to be (but that’s why this is a page about misconceptions).

 

 

Q: Well, I still don’t like the way Ephesians 5:22 uses the word submit. Why does it say submit and not something else?

 

A: If you were to research the Greek word for submit as it’s being used in Ephesians 5:22, you’ll find that the Greek word for “submit” means “to come under the protection of.”

 

With all of these things taken into account, there’s no basis for using this passage as an attack on God’s character and morals, contrary to what the initial question was implying.